A while back we had a cat we called Panda. He was an energetic little thing, mostly white with black patches. We got him from my friend Bill who has cats but they all get inbred because he doesn't get them fixed.
Panda was amazing. He was a hunter. No way around it. He would hunt anything that moved. He caught giant earthworms, mice, rats, bugs, birds, snakes, squirrels, you name it, he caught it.
I once heard an old chinese myth about the ridges on the top of a cat's mouth. The more ridges they have the better hunter they'll be. The cat I had before Panda, I called Tyrone, and I had him for 15 years. He was a great hunter. He had 11 ridges on his upper palate. Our other cat we still have, Tasha, is a shitty hunter. She has 0 ridges on her palate. She doesn't hunt at all.
On a couple occasions I tried to count the ridges on Panda's palate. I got to 13 before he'd squirm and squawk so much I'd lose count. It's kinda hard to count the ridges on the top of a cat's mouth, especialy if it's a crazy little thing like him.
He was autistic. If it involved hunting, he was a brilliant genius. But he couldn't figure out how to push the bathroom door open enough to get through. He'd sit there thinking "That's too small a space to get through, I'm not even going to try." Tasha just puts her shoulder into it and shoves it open. She even pulls doors open by grabbing them with her claws and pulling.
Well, back to Panda's hunting fetish.
One Sunday morning I was laying in bed with Megan. She was still snoozing, and I was just loafing, thinking about making tea, but more thinking about having a nice morning shag with her. The covers were half off me and my dick started to sprout. My eyes were mostly closed, thinking about erotic things to get the blood going the right direction.
In my reverie I hadn't noticed Panda sitting by the side of the bed, but he had noticed me. Or at least my dick. To him it must have looked like some crazy giant worm climbing out of my crotch. He pounced and scored. He caught my cock in his talons and WOKE _ME_ RIGHT UP!
When I screamed and bolted upright with arms aflailing I guess he realized this wasn't just some ordinary garden critter and let go, thank God.
He glanced at my face briefly, before backing away from my firmly clasped package before I realized what had just happened. He got the hell out of the room before I even had the proper consciousness to throw him out.
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